Day Twenty-Five: We Receive "The Talk"

7/10/15, 9:26 PM PDT

Of all the awkward scenarios I can think of, I think T-Pop with Sam's mom and two of her uncles talking about how we aren't allowed to do anything that could get our relationship an "R" rating by the MPAA would be one of the higher placing ones in the "Awkward Scale."

Right up there with "Walking in on parents at their most intimate," and
"Angela getting signatures from the Gears of War people in Comic Con."

Seriously. Over a bowl of curry ramen (which is a lot tastier than it sounds) and honey brick toast, they decided that this was the perfect time for them to tell me that if I so much as touch their daughter, I would be a dead man.

It was awkward. But it was also funny because at some point, Sam's mom went into SO MUCH DETAIL that even Sam's uncles said her mom was nagging too much.

But honestly, have you seen me and Sam? We're like this in public:

It took us almost seven months before we regularly held hands in public, and
even then, the first time both of our palms were singed from the satanic unholiness.

We'll be fine, Mama Mallari. We'll be fine.

And if we do mess up, then her uncles know where I live since they dropped me off home, so I'll be a dead man soonafter.





RFotD: The only consolation about that awkwardness was that I got to eat delicious, T-Pop honey brick toast.

Day Six: My Sister's Friend Annoys My Mom

6/19/14, 9:18 AM PDT

Hey, I'm actually writing my anniversary story now! Wooooooooooooo! Here's my choice of writing music, gonna listen to that on repeat for a few hours.



Same day, 1:54 PM PDT

Picked up my sister from school again. Had to bring her friend, Laura, along because my mom and Laura's mom have a deal going on where they alternate days on who picks up both kids so that they can get more sleep. But I'm pretty sure my mom is 100 percent done with Laura because she DOES NOT STOP TALKING EVER. We had to bring her with us to my job orientation in Carmel Mountain because her mom wasn't gonna be able to pick her up before 3 PM and the entire car ride, she was practically screaming. I mean I didn't care, I thought it was hilarious, but my mom likes quiet car rides, so even though she didn't say anything out of politeness, I could tell she was this close to bursting a blood vessel.

The tipping point? When my mom stopped at McDonalds and asked us (as in my sister and I) what we wanted to eat.

"I want an Oreo McFlurry!" Laura says. No please. No hesitation. No waiting for my mom to ask her directly.

It was around then that mom gave out the most exhausted sigh I've ever heard.



Same day, 9:56 PM PDT

Job orientation at the summer school that I'm working at sucked. Everyone was either from Scripps or Westview, so they all had their own little social groups EXCEPT ME. I arrived 30 minutes early, so awkward, friendless me just sat alone, playing Tetris on my iPhone until the actual orientation started. Then, awkward, friendless me just walked unnoticed in the crowd, following the head of the summer program until training ended.

The campus is really pretty though. It's on a sort of hillside terrace and one building is half on the main terrace, half on a lower story all by itself, so the entire campus sort of looks like a sideways L. It's really hard to explain and I thought it would be rude if I took pictures, so you're just gonna have to take my word that the place was really nice.

After I got home, I napped for a bit, then got on a Google+ call with Angela and Christina. They have this new feature where you can draw things on people's faces and the drawings follow their face as they move around. Basically, think of those really crappy webcam effects where it makes it look like you're wearing a hat or a crown or glitter or whatever. Except it's actually pretty decent. Look at some of the stuff we made.

Angela tracked a drawing of Mario's hat on herself.

Mario

Wants a lick

OF YOUR SOUL.

She also drew a few other things.

Duckface Goldilocks. Thankfully extinct in the wild.

She's either a strawberry or a Cabbage Patch Kid that's high.

Ironically, Drag Queen Angela looks more like a girl than
normal Angela does.

These two are probably my favorite.

Angela doesn't like space camp.

No really, Angela really doesn't like space camp.

We didn't limit our facial vandalism to Angela though.

"It wants to crawl inside my mouth."

Oh, and here's a picture of Angela trying to strangle her dog.

Look at how happy she is to crush that poor dog's trachea.

RFotD: Someone divided Star Wars Episode 4 into 15 second chunks and asked people around the world to select one of those chunks to reshoot in however style they want. Star Wars Uncut is the final product of this project.

SGAT: Wrote a decent chunk of my anniversary story.

Day Eighty: Awkward Times With Corgis

8/30/13, 4:05 PM PDT

Read for the most day, then watched Wipeout with dad and Megan.

You know, I've always wanted to run a Wipeout course. It looks SO EFFING FUN. Even if I don't make it past the qualifier, I just wanna run it. Just two more years, baby.



Same day, 5:20 PM PDT

So apparently, there's an ice rink near my house that I never knew about. Seriously, I thought the closest ice rink to me was all the way in La Jolla. Wow.

We didn't do much there. We just looked around, signed up my sister for skating lessons, and played table ice hockey, which is kind of like table soccer, but with hockey. It's not air hockey, mind you. It has the controls of table soccer and... know what, I'll just show you a picture of what it looks like.

(PICSOCCER)

I played one side while my dad, my sister, and my mom played the other. AND I WON, BABY. AWWWWW YEAAAAAAAAAAAAH. I'd like to thank years of parkour, playing Smash Bros., and Tetris at level 20 and higher for my reaction times.

Then, we went to North Coast mall to avoid the effing SEARING heat. Dear GOD, did today suck. So effing hot, and the air was so stale. Felt like Philippine air.

Anyway, sister and I went to the pet store, saw some adorable as heck animals, most notably this dachshund that pressed its tiny little paw against the glass for FIVE MINUTES STRAIGHT.

I see you, Jake Sully.

We also spotted this dog, who looks like he's had enough of his dead-end life.

Just let me die.

Oh, and we saw a corgi too, playing with some other fluffy dog.

I'm willing to bet his name is "Nick."

Initially, my sister thought that the other fluffy dog was in danger because the corgi kept biting at its neck. But I reassured her that they were just playing.

That's around the time where the corgi started humping the other dog. IN THE MOUTH.

We immediately left.

Nick the corgi. Wanted for sexual assault.

Oh, and there's this giant gumball machine thing in the mall that asks you to guess how many balls are in there. Person that gets the closest wins 500 dollars. So naturally, being an unemployed high school student who wants to buy loads of crap, I wanted that money.

But I wasn't about to just randomly guess, or count how many balls are in there. I'm gonna use math. Took a picture of my sister standing next to both of the machines (which are effing HUGE, by the way), then took a picture of a ruler on top of my sister's face for size comparison. Later, when I get home, I'll open up both pictures and use my sister's face to get a rough estimate of both the size of the machine and the size of an individual gumball, find the volume of both the machine and the gumball, divide the volume of half of the machine by the volume of a single gumball (half because only half of the machine was filled with gumballs) and submit my answer.

Effing MATH.

High five for staying in school!

RFotD: Formulas for sphere packing, or the arrangement of non-overlapping spheres within a containing space, don't account for the large amounts of waste space generated from random placement.

SGAT: Read books.

Day Sixty-Seven: Frodo's a Pedophile

8/17/13, 7:29 PM PDT

Up early. The entire group of six or so teenagers, including myself, went to the arcade to play pool/random arcade games. Played Metal Slug with Adrien, then made tie dye shirts. Well, the little kids made tie dye shirts. We sort of just watched and harassed them.

Got bored and accidentally stabbed my pinky playing 5 Finger Fillet, then rock climbed against Adrian. Won one because I had a head start, then lost the other two times. In my defense, he's going into his sophomore year of college and I haven't picked up anything heavier than myself and a 5,000 dollar camera all summer.

Then we all swam. And holy crap, was this the funniest part of the day.

So we're just swimming, minding our own business. The pool's only four and a half feet deep, so us teenagers swam with the tiny kids, who were playing with my sister's inner tube. One of the little kids (Kayla) was currently inside the inner tube, minding her own business.

Suddenly, this blue figure moves across the ocean. Is it a shark? Perhaps a dolphin that's lost its way?

Nope. It's a little white boy in a blue rashguard that looks a lot like Frodo Baggins. Nowhere near as graceful as a dolphin (though, probably just as perverted as one). And you know what he does? HE TRIES TO SWIM INTO THE INNER TUBE, CURRENTLY OCCUPIED BY A LITTLE GIRL.

And you know what makes it worse? HE MISSED. AND ACCIDENTALLY STICKS THE TOP OF HIS HEAD ON KAYLA'S BUTT. And of course, Kayla's having NONE OF THIS. She's panicking and flailing and screaming "SOMEONE'S HEAD IS IN MY BUTT" and at this point, I'm just going CRAZY with laughter. Eventually, my sister gets in the inner tube and the same kid tries again. Aw hellllllll naw.

AND HE SUCCEEDS IN BEING IN THE SAME INNER TUBE AS MY SISTER. Being a pacifist (err, coward), I do nothing as my sister manages to free herself from the tube and run away screaming, while the kid's just standing there, oblivious, hiding underneath his scuba goggles.

The kid proceeds to cause general ruckus in the pool, such as swimming under my legs, following a large Mexican guy around the pool (to which the Mexican man exclaimed "He's following me!" after discovering that he has a new follower), and stealing a mermaid tail.

Frodo's a pedophile.

Oh, and we also rented karts and played Egyptian War. Sister and I rode this one kart that was a two-seater, she freaked out about how fast I was going. Worth it.





RFotD: Egyptian War's origins can be dated to a game called "Beggar-My-Neighbour," originating in Britain during the 1860s.

SGAT: None really.

Day Forty-Eight: Just One Big Social Experiment

7/29/13, 7:15 AM PDT

Camp time, aww yeah! Woke up at 6 to prep for camp, which is three hours earlier than I'm used to. But that's okay, because it's god damn FILM CAMP.



Same day, 7:45 AM PDT

So, due to impeccable timing, we're actually really early to camp. We got here at 7:30 and check in begins in half an hour. So, mom has left and I'm sitting here at UCSD waaaay early. There's not much to do, so I guess I'll be writing on my phone for most of the day.

A bit of analysis on the other camp people. The staff look nice enough, they're certainly not old, strict film veterans. Most are in their 20s, 30s.

As for the other campgoers, so far they all look like I could count the number of years they've been alive on two hands, which is worrying. I don't want to be that one kid in the group photo that's a thousand times taller than the other kids. The site said that the camp's for ages 18 an under, but I swear, if nobody's broken the 13 year barrier except me...

Anyway, did some walking around the campus to kill some time. The place where they're holding these classes has really nice skybridges across the buildings.

Prettttyyyyyy.

They also have these neat little pixel robot things and movie cameras stuck on windows using Post-it notes.

Don't know why a light would be right in front of a camera, but okay.

They're adorable. Except the one on the left. Reminds me of the demon
in that one game that moves the screen.

Apart from that, there's really not that much in this tiny little quarter that the camp's taking up.

Should've brought my PSP so I could play more Random Emerald.



Same day, 8:08 AM PDT

Check ins have started, aww yeah. Met one other teenager, but he wasn't in the same class as I was, so yeah. At least my social skills are semi-improving, which is nice.

Also, it seems that my Doctor Who shirt is garnering a decent amount of attention, just as I expected. Seems like a great icebreaker, two people have already approached me. So has my bag, which in the shape of an NES controller. Heh.

Made friends with one teacher, which is pretty awesome. A kid also pointed out my bag. Heheheh.



Same day, 12:14 PM PDT

A bit more lecture after a 30 minute break where we captured a flag, then lunchtime. Sat with a few people that shared two critical similarities with me: They brought their own lunch and they like Doctor Who.

I'm glad that I wore this shirt, it's done wonders for my social skills.

Also, some kids are sitting behind us. Non-teenagers, mind you. Interesting bunch, these summer camp kids. I can't tell if they're smart or just weird. They were talking about drawings they drew and one criticized the other about drawing sunglasses on a sun's face.

I have to give it to them, sunglasses on a sun is pretty stupid.



Same day, 12:16 PM PDT

The kids are playing songs popular on the Internet.

Yep. They're insufferable.



Same day, 3:55 PM PDT

So there's this girl sitting all by herself during break while the rest of the group is laughing and having fun. So, me being the gentleman I am, decide to walk up to her and talk to her. Not because she's pretty, but because I'm a gentleman.

Simple start. "Do you mind if I sit here?" She sighs, and nods. I try to strike light conversation and all I'm getting are one-worded responses and nods while she mindlessly types away at her phone. I ask why she's not talking much and she says she only talk a lot when she's tired. And she's not tired.

I think she brushed me off. Thankfully, the bell saved the day and we had to go back to classes right after that.

She wasn't that pretty anyway.



Same day, 6:10 PM PDT

Quickly, before I get to the real highlight of the day, I'll tell you about my film group and my movie.

It sucks.

It consists of two hyperactive 13 year old boys, an uninterested 13 year old girl, and a 16 year old white kid that keeps interrupting class to try and one-up the teacher by saying things he knows before the teacher can say it. And the first idea out of their mouths?

"Banana guns."

Admittedly, it's a unique concept, but the ideas they threw around with it are RIDICULOUS. Genius ideas such as

"Let's put a CGI Hulk in there!" and

"Let's wear funny hats for absolutely no reason!" and of course

"BANANA. ZOMBIES."

But, with my leadership, I've straightened out the concept of Banana Guns and made it a pretty decent action comedy. And hey, they casted me as the protagonist, which is pretty cool.

The 16 year old white kid still claimed all responsibility for his ideas though. Pbbbth.

Anyway, now to the meat of the day. So due to my parents' awkward schedule, they told me that I should wait at Westfield UTC, a few ways off UCSD. They tell me to take the trolley, so I use my average skills of public transportation to figure out where to go and I get on the correct trolley.

Turns out, my average public transportation skills are actually sub-average. Might even be considered "mediocre." Or I could blame San Diego's public transport, which is confusing as hell, but I doubt that, because all these people seem to know exactly where to get on and off.

Needless to say, I got very confused. I got off the UCSD trolley and reoriented myself, figured out what trolley I needed, and went on it.

That's about the time I realized that there's a clockwise and counterclockwise route. And I got on the wrong one.

Got off again, this time decided to ask for directions at the bus stop. One guy didn't know zip about the MTS, so that makes three people clueless about public transportation in that stop. Me, that other guy, and me again, because my public transportation skills are so bad that I count as two negative people.

Second person I asked was really helpful. Told me where to go. He probably knew where to go since he was a bus driver. So I listened to him, got on the bus...

And the fare's $2.25. I have a single dollar bill. And a 20. They don't give change.

The bus driver was AWESOMELY nice though, and decided to give me the fare for a dollar. What a nice dude.

After an entire HOUR of waiting, finally made it to Westfield. My legs ache and the bottom of my spine is killing me from the amount of walking I had to do. This Nintendo shoulder bag isn't helping much either.





RFotD: Digital Media Academy initially started out in Stanford University, but slowly expanded through a few US states and even into Canada.

SGAT: Made movie things, learned film terminology. Err, reviewed film terminology would be a more appropriate term.

Day Eleven: Del Mar Fair: The Sequel

6/22/13, 11:07 AM PDT

Owwwww. Ow, ow, ow, ow, my neck hurts. It's an indescribable pain, it's not searing or unbearable, but it's not exactly pleasant either. And it doesn't hurt to move it. I just can't move it as fast as before, nor can I turn my head as far. But it'll wear out eventually. This is the second time I've landed on my neck, and it's pretty similar to last time.

Maybe third time's the charm and I'll die the next time I land on my neck. Hopefully, I'm wrong, but just to be safe, I'll be taking it pretty easy during parkour from now on. Probably going to be limiting the number of flips I do because they're impractical in the real world.

Alright. Time to write now. Be back in a bit.



Same day, 1:43 PM PDT

So my computer blue screened on me, which reminded me to finally clean out the dust filters that clogged up the fans. Haven't done that in about five, six months? Even though Darren recommended that I clean it out once a month. I try to remember, but it's hard to stick to a schedule when I have so much to do.

Speaking of "so much to do", I better start my summer assignments soon, or at least planning out the reading/outline schedule. Plus, I have to get writing on this week's blog entry, have to start my new short film script, have to get supplies together to build the remote control car that I want to make, oh boy oh boy better get off video games and back to work.



Same day, 6:22 PM PDT

Getting really into writing my script. Got the basic outline down, just filling in a lot of the details. Also, looking up a bunch of intros/music in spy movies/games, notably the intro to Skyfall, Casino Royale,  and Snake Eater so that I get a feel of what spy music and Bond intros look like.

And yep, it's gonna be a spy movie. But don't take it too seriously, it's not meant to be dramatic, serious action. Trying to make it a bit outrageous. Plus, it'll be my first real short film, which means zero-budget. Gonna have to cut costs a bit, and by a bit, I mean gonna be pretty much using household materials since I have absolutely no money.

Or, I could get a job. Dad's been encouraging me to apply for a part-time job at Target, which I'm considering just to fund my film without pissing off my parents by straining their wallets.

Back to writing. Wait no. I lied. Headed to the Del Mar Fair again so my family can watch Big Time Rush perform live while I roam the fair again. Awwww yeah.



Same day, 8:15 PM PDT

Fair again. Pretty much all by myself since the family's watching the concert. Seeing as I'm incredibly thrifty, I've decided not to spend any money and instead just people watch, which in itself is plenty interesting. Noticing the kinds of people that hang around each area. Obviously, the majority of teenagers spend their time where the rides are, with a small handful near the food stands. Female teenagers especially, I've noticed near the photo booth, although there's a bit of diversity there too. Adults, they're a bit more varied, but I've noticed that the "tougher looking" adults with wifebeaters and tattoos are usually around the games areas, with their wives and girlfriends. The more "average" adults are pretty varied in terms of location. The men tend to be near food or occasionally shops, while the women tend to be around shops mostly. Not stereotyping, just an observation.

Group and couple interaction's interesting as well. All-male groups of three or more are all around the rides, obviously. Haven't noticed any male groups any place else. Mixed groups too, mostly around the rides, but I saw one around the shop area. Female groups... They're everywhere. Couples are interesting too. Teenage couples, just like in school, tend to hold hands while staying as far apart as physically possible, maybe to further showcase that they're in a relationship. Adults are closer together when holding hands.

I've also noticed that while roaming the area, not a single games stand employee approached me to try their games. Maybe because I was alone, maybe because I look like a serial killer, not sure which. Speaking of looking like a murderer, I've noticed that the guard at the center of the fair's been looking at me suspiciously. Then again, I circled that guy like 50 times, so he probably thinks I'm a pickpocket or something. Don't know why since I look like the nerdiest thing ever with my half-bowl cut hair, my cloth shoulder bag, and my "Dunder Mifflin" shirt, but hey, criminals come in all shapes and sizes.

Haven't made my way to the kid area yet in the center of the racetrack, so I will be there shortly. After buying some food, probably.



Same day, 8:54 PM PDT

Rode the skyride thingy that goes over the entire park. Alone. Even though I have a fear of heights.

It was surprisingly relaxing, even though I was dangling my feet in the air. Took a bunch of pictures. One girl looked back up at me as I took a picture of the fair below me, which was pretty awkward. God, I'm brimming with awkwardness.

See her? A bit below and to the right of the center of the picture,
next to the stroller, looking right at me? Yep. Awkward.

Anyway, visited the children's area. One word describes it all.

Asian. Asian kids, followed by Asian parents EVERYWHERE. Of course, I'm not complaining, but WOW. The density of it surprised me.

ASIAN. ALL OF IT. Not complaining, of course.

Now currently in the arcade area of the fair, or whatever you call the main room. It's filled with board and video game, and TV game show info, along with a handful of arcade games. They had an auction corner where they were selling off a bunch of guitars signed by people that performed last year.

Switchfoot and Cobra Starship's somewhere there too.

One was signed by Cody Simpson, which may or may not interest a few of you. I probably know who you are if you're willing to bid on such an item.

Current bid? 400 dollars.

A group of people were playing giant Jenga, which was ridiculously entertaining, especially with commentary from black people. I managed to catch the game during its last few turns, where the majority of the tower was already a wireframe in essence. A lady managed to pull out a block after 15 minutes of Jenga setup, which was ridiculously tense. She pulled it out and the crowd cheered in celebration. The black people gave a huge "Boo-yah!" which cracked me up.

Lady in question. Note the black guy to the
left of her in the maroon shirt.

Then, the next guy went. He was in a very, very tight spot. Half the tower was balancing on one center block, he'd have to be a master Jenga player (Jengaer? Jengær?) to top that.

Of course, he wasn't. And it tipped over. But not after 3 minutes of hilarious black guy commentary. They were easily the loudest people in the crowd that gathered to watch this giant Jenga game, but every time people laughed, they shushed them forcefully, which was ridiculously funny.

Also, guy gave me two tickets on my way out of the thing. Don't know what I can ride with two tickets, but whatever, free stuff is free.



Same day, 9:42 PM PDT

Bought some food. Cheeseburger from Grantburger. It was decent, but incredibly hot. Like scalding hot, I've never had a burger burn my tongue before today.

Sat alone at a picnic table while eating, which was interesting because every other table was stuffed to the gills. But I'm not complaining, it was pretty peaceful.

Then, went around to go look for the cheapest drink around. Decided to buy it at this fish and chips stand, which sold bread bowls with soup. Reminds me of Panera and how Kayla tried to sneak it in.

Back on topic, the drink. It was a three dollar drink. Wait, no. No it wasn't. Let me rephrase that, it was a three dollar cup of ice. Because I only got three sips out of that cup before I hit ice. I mean come on, you fair food sellers already pull outrageous prices on the most ridiculous meals and you make thousands of dollars in profit every year, yet you still have to resort to scamming people with ice cups?

DAMN IT, I'M STILL THIRSTY.

You sicken me. You sicken me like the probably undercooked burger that I just ate, because I'm feeling a bit sick to my stomach and the California Health Inspection didn't exactly review your stand, Grantburger, if that's even your real name.



Same day, 10:18 PM PDT

What is this now, the third hour of roaming the fair? Pretty tired. And there's still no sign of the concert being over.

Now looking at the less visited areas of the mall. Just looked at their mineral and gem exhibit. Asked one of the exhibitors a bunch of questions on gem purity, hardness, and techniques of how they cut gems because why not, I mean more knowledge, right? Turns out, the guy gave me a mini-lesson on how to cut gems with a machine thing, which was pretty cool.

Phone's pretty low on battery now. Gonna go explore some more while using my backup battery, I guess.



Same day, 11:01 PM PDT

Went to the Student Showcase in the fair as they finally left the concert. They had some very nice artwork on display.

Ooh, pretty.

This one was my favorite though.

Who's that Pokémon?

They also had what I think is the winning robot from the FIRST Robotics tournament they had this year, which I took part in last year. Well, somewhat. I kind of did CAD designs, helped out in judging the website, and wrote two blog posts for the site, but other than that, I didn't do much.

Hello, Frisbeebot.

Oh, and apparently, they have a bunch of yearbooks on display and gave them all rankings. Did you know we were second place? Well, technically, second place but tied with a hell of a lot of other schools.

Not bad, huh?

This is one of the schools we tied with.

HOLY CRAP, THERE'S A GODDAMN WOLF ON THE COVER.

And then there's Scripps.

I don't know how Scripps Ranch's yearbook beat ours, I believe that our yearbook was superior in every aspect.

Well... maybe the font change on the "H" was a little strange. But that's a minor complaint.

Also, bwahahaha, my Scripps friends, I know what your yearbook photos look like.



Same day, 11:45 PM PDT

Finally in the car, headed home. Traffic's slow to a crawl, so I'm taking the time to update this.

Reached 11,628 steps today, which is pretty good.

Wooper's feelin' pretty good right now.

Also, apparently maxed out my Watts in the Pokéwalker, probably because I haven't sent Wooper to the DS in years.

Probably should go do that now.

Also, dad says I should have gone to the concert because quote "there were a million hot chicks up in this." How the hell my dad picked up that vocabulary, I'm not sure. But it led to a conversation on what I'm looking for in a girl, which I hate talking about with my parents because they judge me harshly about being "too picky." I'm sorry if I have high standards because I take dating seriously, mom and dad.

But they did bring up a point. I haven't dated anyone since high school started and I'm already a Junior. Maybe I should try to get a girlfriend now. Maybe.

So, anyone interested in dating me? Send in your application via Facebook, complete with resume, past job experience, and an essay describing why you want to be my girlfriend (500 words maximum). Many will enter, few will win, valid only to citizens or permanent residents of the United States and its territories.

HAH. Just kidding. As if I'd be selective enough to need applications for someone to be my girlfriend and to have geographical restrictions. I'm not selective at all. In fact, the more appropriate term would probably be "desperate." Haha, yes indeed.

*quietly weeps*

"Don't worry, Michael. I'll always be here for you."

Aww, thanks, robot frisbee thrower.





RFotD: Online dating research reveals that women are most concerned about a potential partner’s height, while men are more concerned about the weight of a possible date. Men even just an inch under the average height and women more than 20 pounds overweight have a tougher time getting a date. Well damn it.

SGAT: None really.

Day Two: Purges and Pickups

6/13/13, 9:05 AM PDT

Woke up early again to drop my sister off. You know those Safety Patrol kids in elementary school? The ones that dress in red clothes and direct the pedestrian traffic in front of the school? I think it's a helpful little school program. Makes it pretty easy for me to cross the street without getting killed.

That's why the sheer "doucheness" (for lack of a better word) of this guy is worthy of mention. This morning, Safety Patrol was going about their normal routine. Whistle person blew once, signaling the other Safety Patrol kids to lower their stop signs. As usual, safety patrol waited around five seconds to make sure no cars were coming around. The whistle person was about to blow twice, signaling that we could cross, when suddenly, some jerk, on his phone while driving, decides to turn at that same intersection, ignoring the poor, innocent Safety Patrol kids doing their job.

Of course, everyone flips out about how rude the guy is. Or, maybe it was just me, I didn't notice anyone else doing anything.

Anyway, after I dropped my sister off, I decided to go for a run around my neighborhood. I hadn't run any distance longer than half a mile in about a year, so I wanted to get back in shape. Stretched, got my music on and everything.

I only lasted ten minutes. Ten minutes.

Holy crap, am I unhealthy. I used to be able to run for half an hour straight in middle school, but now ten minutes?

I gotta get back in shape. So starting today, I'm gonna be working out a lot more. I'm sticking to a stricter exercise schedule. Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, I'll be jogging laps around my neighborhood. Tuesday and Thursday mornings, I'll be working on upper body. Crunches, sit ups, push ups, whatever. Friday nights are gonna be parkour sessions as usual. Weekends are rest days, with 30 crunches in the morning and 30 crunches at night.

Wish me luck, guys! Hopefully, before summer ends, I'll get a 10 pack or something.



Same Day, 2:30 PM PDT

Been tweaking my Minecraft server for a bit. Have to say, it's pretty awesome. Wanna play? Message me on Facebook and I'll probably give you the IP!



Same Day, 7:43 PM PDT

Went to go watch "The Purge" with Angela, Christina, Christina' cousin (forgot his name, so here on out, I'll call him CC), Kayla, Nick, Alex (Angela's brother), and a few of Alex's friends.

Well... technically, we watched Star Trek. We cheated the system by buying tickets to Star Trek, getting snacks, and turning to The Purge. Made me feel dirty and ugly for doing it, especially since my preferred career of choice is "screenwriter," but whatever, I'll let it slide today if only because I've really wanted to see it. Saw Brandon at the theaters too, but he didn't watch with us.

Wait, hold on, before I go on about the movie, I have to tell you the stuff that happened before the film. So we arranged to meet at Panera Bread before the movie started. I got there the earliest because my house is closest, so I waited at a table by myself for awhile.

Then, Nick came. And the awkwardness burrowed itself right between us.

It started with light conversation.

"Hey."

"Sup."

Followed by a cold 5 minutes of dead silence and phone twiddling.

He touched my foot once. AND THE AWKWARDNESS DOUBLED. Jesus, the awkwardness smelled stronger than the scent of bread at Panera. Thank god Angela came in before the restaurant imploded on itself from the sheer density of the awkwardness. Even a second longer and the awkwardness would've collapsed into a singularity.

I bought a yogurt parfait and Nick brought a breadbowl with soup. I was kind of mad that he didn't finish the bread, but whatever.

Christina, Kayla, and CC came soon after. Around 10 minutes were left before the movie started and what does Kayla decide to buy? Another goddamn breadbowl. Course her tiny stomach couldn't swallow the whole thing in less than 10 minutes, so what does she do? SHE DECIDES TO SNEAK IT INTO THE MOVIE THEATER.

Alright, now for the actual movie. It was pretty bad. The concept was amazing, but the writers were STUPID with the story. It was composed entirely of unnecessary jump scares and plot twists that were either incredibly predictable or incredibly dumb, sometimes both.

I bet I could write a better story. You know what? I think I will. Expect it probably next week.

Then, we went to Barnes and Noble. And that's where the real fun was at.

We found a book of pickup lines.

Probably my favorite book of all time.

Some of those were comedic GOLD. Who could forget classic lines such as

"Hey babe, have you ever had sex on a motorized scooter?" Or

"When they tested Viagra, I was in the control group." Or the unforgettable

"I'll pay you."

Then we walked into the kids' section and found a book specifically made to explain physical changes caused by puberty to girls. I was horrified by every page. Every. Page.

Pure and unquestionable nightmare fuel for the average
male teenager.

Oh, and if you were thinking about getting me a birthday present, that book would do. Or, wait, no, I'd actually prefer this MAKE YOUR OWN RANSOM KIT.

Perfect for weddings and parties!

We also found the Bible, illustrated with LEGO BRICKS.

They actually got really creative with this one, I'm
impressed.

Yep, all in all a pretty good day.





RFotD: President James Garfield could write Latin with one hand and Greek in the other simultaneously.

Summer Goals Accomplished Today (SGAT): Started getting back in shape.